Pages...

Wednesday 25 September 2019

Update on Stage 1 so far...

We are NEARLY there! It has taken abit longer than expected just because of the amount of checks and references that need to be done by people close to us, professionals and the authority.

The adoption workers have everything they need now except 3 things: Josh is still waiting for his DBS to come back, my transplant hospital still haven't completed their reference and the medical advisor has to review our GP medicals to make sure they are happy with them. I am going to have to chase my hospital tomorrow - I know they are busy but they have had it since July and we can't move on until we have it! I am not worried about the reference as it was my transplant hospital who put us forward for the surrogacy - they will just be happy that we are doing every other option rather than me carrying a child. 

We have also been told that we need a final visit from our social worker before we move to Stage 2. This has worried me slightly, and her visit is booked for 8th October, so we have 2 weeks to worry about what it is about. She has said it is nothing to worry about and not to be nervous and they just want to clarify a few things so hopefully it isn't anything too major. 

Since the last blog update, we had our 4 days of preparation training. These were long, hard days of full of lots of information and advice which was interesting, but also alot to take in. We were very nervous to attend but the other group members were lovely and we got on with everyone and it was nice to be able to chat and hear about their situations and general thoughts. A whole range of people were there: couples who have been through IVF, loss of babies, same sex couples, single adopters and couples like us who were there for medical reasons. We now have a 'whatsapp' group which is actually really lovely to have and a bigger source of support than I expected. I love hearing from them all and hearing their updates - we are all, except one couple, still waiting to hear about moving to Stage 2, so we are all in the same boat! Meeting these people was definitely one of the best things to come out of the training and I hope we continue to support each other. 

I am feeling slightly fed up and impatient lately. Not just with the adoption stuff but in general. I suppose you are going to get periods of these feelings. I just didn't realise how difficult and mentally hard this Stage 1 part was. I have been chasing and reading and communicating with different people and departments since we were accepted onto Stage 1 at the end of June - I'm knackered! Of course it will all be worth it but doesn't mean it isn't hard work. 

I would also just like to end on asking a little favour: I am more than happy to talk about anything - whether its about my health journey, adoption journey or anything to do with my life - but when you do ask about the adoption journey, please don't keep saying "people that can get pregnant naturally don't have to go through all this", or "why do you have to do all that, it's alot of work". Trust me I know and I agree, but it has to be done and that's what is needed in order for us to get a child. I can't change that.  Both me and Josh do love the amount of people that are behind us and ask about how we are getting on, those little comments do really help - we need all the help and support we can get. 


No comments:

Post a Comment